Losing your job and learning lessons along the way

Most people don't know this, but I lost my job a few months ago. (My day job for those that only know me through my photography business) Well, we'll call it "reassigned to a different department". The company I was employed with for over 6 years lost their contract, and a new company took over.

In one fell swoop I lost the promotion I had earned three years before, my title, my office, forty percent of my pay...and of greatest surprise to me, a piece of my identity.

I have never been one to feel defined by their career. Or so I thought. It shouldn't shock me, I suppose. I mean, work IS where we spend the majority of our waking hours, isn't it?

Still, it knocked me off my feet and for a short time, into a dark place. I feel very lucky that it took 36 years to truly experience what depression felt like, and even luckier that it was very, very short-lived. I've always considered myself a pretty positive, happy-go-lucky-everything-will-always-work-out kind of person. Hell, it's my mantra - my husband even says it now. But for the first time, I could empathize with people who experience depression on a daily basis, and it gave me new insight/understanding of what they go through, how they're not able to just pull themselves out of it. I will admit, I couldn't quite grasp that notion before. Lesson numero uno.

Going from being the boss to being an employee, where one of your employees is now YOUR boss is a humbling experience as well. Again, I am fortunate that our small group has been working together so long that we are like a family, and they were all incredibly accomodating and understanding of how I might feel with such a change. But, being on the other side of the equation again did help me to see some of the errors of my ways in being a manager and, at times, only thinking of the good of the company first. While that is of course important, so are the lives each of us lead every day - and sometimes both can and should be considered (and weighed carefully) at the same time. It also helped me to see that each of us are perfectly, imperfectly human, but at the end of the day if the work is getting done, I could stand to ease up and let people do things the way they know how to do it. Also, being in charge is REALLY stressful and sometimes it's nicer to be the employee! I also have the best co-workers in the world and you can't put a price on that. Lessons two, three, and four.

Lastly, and perhaps the greatest lesson I learned, is that my husband and my child think the world of me no matter what my title or status in life. The hardest day, my last day in my old position, when I had to pack up my office and race downstairs to the safety of our truck before I started sobbing, my husband gave me the best gifts he could have...a) chocolate, and b) a card that said he believed in me and knew that one day I would have a new job, a new title, and a new office, or that maybe this was all meant to open a completely different door for me...but no matter what, everything would all work out. Throughout the last few months, he has supported me every single day. Every time I was feeling down, he would scoop me and my deflated, stupid ego up off the floor, dust us both off, and repeat the mantra..."Everything will work out, and even if you don't ever have an office or a title again, as long as you find something you enjoy that makes you happy, that's all that matters."

So, I'm sitting here thinking on a Sunday evening...as I get ready to start my last week at my job on the base and venture into something brand new, I am happy. I am excited for this new adventure. I have no idea if my new job comes with an office, and I truly don't care. I will be excited if I have a window, and anyone who works with me will get that joke.

I am beyond blessed with the family, friends, and coworkers I'm surrounded by. With all of them by my side, I know everything will always work out. I will never doubt that mantra again.

And the winner is...

Announcement Day! I think this is one of my new favorite days in the history of ever!!!

You didn't make it easy, couples. The stories just seem to keep getting better and better, and this year was no exception. We had some incredible love stories and amazing couples...but in the end, there can be only one.

It took our panel of six judges all week to decide.

Ok, enough suspense.

Congratulations Karen & Max, you are the winners of the 2015 Wedding Photography Giveaway!!!!! Lynsey and I are beyond excited to shoot your BIG DAY next June!

Here is a photo of the winning couple and their beautiful love story that had at least 4 judges crying. The other 2 will not confirm or deny anything.

We met on October 4th, 2008. It was Michigan State University's Homecoming game; I was down visiting a friend for the weekend and Max was living in East Lansing at the time and also had some of his friends down for the big game weekend.

As fate would have it we ended up at the same bar that night; Harpers in downtown East Lansing. I was waiting at the bar to order drinks with my friend and Max and a friend were casually waiting next to us. Naturally conversation was started between the 4 of us and when the bartender finally came around to our side Max offered to get us girls a shot. What a gentleman right ;) I personally am NOT a fan of shots, but who's going to turn down a free drink when you're 23...graciously we accepted. Max reached out to hand me my tequila shot and somehow ended up dropping it straight down to my feet; I told him no worries I didn't really want a shot anyway and we parted each going back to own friends. 

Later on that night we bumped into each other at the bar again and I said "Hey! You owe me a drink!" (Max claims at this point in the story that he searched me out, maybe he did, but to me at the time it seem like pure coincidence) Of course he got us both a drink (Rum and Coke this time) and we started chatting. We talked the whole rest of the night; both of our separate parties of friends ended up moving on for the night, but we just sat and talked and drank and talked some more; by night's end he gave me cab money to get back to my friend's house and walked me out to wait for it to come pick me up. He let me put his sweater on while we waiting (it can get pretty brisk on an Oct night in MI) I gave him my number and told him to call me sometime; just as I went to get in the cab to leave he reached out to me and said "Wait can I get my sweater back?" (I still make fun of him for this...worried he'd never see me or the sweater again) 

But that was not the case, the very next week he called me to see if he could take me out on a "real date." I lived in my hometown, Alma Michigan, at the time which is about 45 minutes north of East Lansing where Max lived and he came all the way up to Alma to take me out the very next Saturday. After that we were inseparable. We talked on the phone every single night for hours on end and we would take turns going back and forth from Alma and East Lansing each weekend to spend time together. By Thanksgiving that year we were officially using the "boyfriend/girlfriend" labels...that's when you know it's serious right :) 

We had a blissful first year together, but it wasn’t easy. Max's dad passed away from cancer in June of 2009 (we'd been dating just 8 months) and that's when I got to meet the whole family. It’s hard enough meeting the whole family immediate and extended at your significant other's father's funeral, but also to be told the whole time "Ooo Max has never brought a girl home for us to meet before" talk about pressure! Then in July we found out that Max was getting deployed to Afghanistan in September (he was in the Army Reserve then, he's transferred to the Air Force now) So at only 11 months together we said goodbye to each other  for a year while he went over seas. Max tried to break up with me before he left saying he didn't want to put me through the tough times of the deployment. I told him No! That is not a reason for us to break up! I told him I loved him and I wanted to be with him no matter how “hard” it was going to be. I reminded him that he was going to need my support as much as I would need his to get through the deployment together.  That's what we did, he was able to call me probably about once a week at least even it was only for a few minutes, (I pretty much had my phone glued to my hand the whole year never knowing when the next long awaited call would come though) I would email him every night before I went to sleep just telling him what I did that day and what was going on back home; even when I had days where I literally had nothing of interest to tell him about he still said it was fun to read my boring nonsense about what TV shows I watched after work that day. He left in September of 2009 and got home in September of 2010. It was a long hard year, when I look back at it now it feels like an eternity ago, but I think it did make us stronger  as a couple and so much more appreciative of our time with each other and all our loved ones. 

When Max got home from Afghanistan in 2010 we took the next big step and moved in together. He had decided after his deployment that he wanted to go back to school and into a completely different field. He was a surveyor when we met and he has gone back to school to become a Speech Language Pathologist. He hopes to soon be working at a VA hospital with wounded veterans needing therapy to learn to speak, chew or swallow again. We moved to Lansing together when he got back; he started taking classes at Lansing Community College and I quit my job in Alma and started working at another  Insurance company in Lansing. After the first year at LCC Max was able to transfer into Grand Valley State University in Grand Rapids to finish his bachelor’s, so in 2011 we moved to Grand Rapids. (Lucky for me insurance is an industry you can move relatively easily in) Max graduated from GVSU last spring and was accepted into Grad School at Grand Valley this winter; he will be graduating with his Masters in Speech Language Pathology in April of 2015. 

We both LOVE to travel, we had been planning a 2 week trip to Europe a little over a year; we just went this past Christmas through the New Year. We went to Amsterdam, Berlin, and Prague. Max proposed to me on Dec 28th 2013 in Prague; it was magical. I can't say I was totally surprised, we've been together a little over 5 years now, I had a feeling it was coming, but it was still a simply breathtaking moment. Just like a movie, perfect!

We decided to wait until Max gets done with grad school to give ourselves a little time to relax and for him to start the job search before we have the wedding, so we decided on June of 2015; it can not get here soon enough! I can not wait for him to be finally be able to do his dream job!! And for us to then be ready to settle down and start a family :) Hopefully we get a few more awesome trips planned in there too; we are thinking Greece for the honeymoon! 

We are going with a "Travel" theme focusing on places we’ve been together and other important places in our lives. I am planning to have each table at the ceremony represent a "place" (Instead of being at table 12 you'll be seated in Berlin, where we spent Christmas this year) Centerpieces will include an antique picture frame with a couple snap shots and blurb about why each place is special to us along with other "vintage" "travel" inspired things. I also plan to DIY some decor using old maps as an underlying theme and to give us the color palette. 
 

We deserve this prize because we think we have an Amazing Love Story!! And with Max still in school and not working yet it would help us ease the expense of the wedding. My parents will be pitching in, but Max's side is not in any position to help out financially, so we will be covering a great deal of expense on our own. We would LOVE to win the photography package and have you help us share our Amazing Love Story!